message from ayah bonda

Our beloved parents, are now flying off to Medinah. They will be staying over there for a week before jetting off to Mecca and InsyaAllah this is going to be their second time to perform the pilgrimage. I hope they will have a smooth sailing  journey ahead. Ameen.

Now I know where is my interest of writing sometimes comes from after receiving this forwarded text message from my Ayah after he was leaving on a jet plane. I guess it runs in the genes.

Salam sayang anak-anak tercinta. Doakan kedua2 ibu bapa mu semoga sejahtera. Semoga haji mabrur yang diterima.Pejam matamu seketika, apa perasaan mu semasa kita bersama. Apa pula tika kami tiada.Anak2 ku berilah kasih setia kpd kami berdua.Sejahteralah perasaan kami berdua.Umur kami bukan berjuta, hanya seketika.Jangan huru harakan keluarga, kami ingin tenang di hujung usia. Belailah emosi kami sentiasa bahagia.

Pelbagai penyakit menimpa diri kami berdua.Sejambak doa daripada kalianagar kami berjaya. Salam sayang,Salam rindu moga2 kita masih akan bersua.Selamat tinggal anakanda kalian. Doakan kami selamat pergi dan kembali.Janganlah buat angkara yang menyayat bonda dan bapa.Bye2 anak2 ku. Doakan kita jumpa lagi tanpa perkara yang tak didingini menimpa kami berdua. Seandainya kami tewas dipersada tanah muliairingi kami doa2 anda moga kami sejahtera dialam fana. Assalamualaikum sayang2 semua~ ayah and bonda tua~

Seriously, this message really makes my heart wrenching, heavyhearted, gloomy~mix feelings~.especially when I am the one who does not have the chance to send them at the airport , sigh.

My beloved parents, semoga selamat urusan disana dan selamat pergi dan kembali dan mendapat haji mabrur..amenn.

We are not certain about the circumstances but we pray for the best..InsaAllah.

Speechless, perhaps..

I was on the bus last night after coming back from the park with my family. Since the bus was sardines packed, I gave up my seat to an old man and stood by the middle door. suddenly, I saw one African boy about 7 years old gave up his seat to sit at the other seat at the front, so hesitate not, I took his place instead. After 10 minutes or so he returned back and reclaimed his seat from me by saying that was his seat. His mum who sat next to my seat said nothing. She seemed pleased and agreed with him. I was like, 'err this is for real?'. Seriously, I was  'speechless'.

Since, there were too many people on the bus, I did not want to make scene and show my bad manners so , I just said this to him' your ticket has not got reservation seat number, once you left you must know that this is not yours any more'. After saying those words, I stood up and let him took the seat.

I did not know he understands or not but I think parents should teach the right manners. This is not Africa, even though you as a parent did not get a proper civic lesson in your back home, does not mean u should not teach your kid about civilization'. Sometimes, people from some countries do not know how to adapt with the local cultures. Such as the driving attitude, taking turn and etc. Please people, when you go to other's country do not expect to behave like when you were back home. It is not appropriate . 

So, in a nutshell, 'When in Belgium do as the Belgian do'. take a good example, leave the bad one...

This is a picture of my son. The little girl who stood behind him was taught by his dad to take turn with Haris, see this is what we should do! nurturing our kids when they are still small.

What is stopping me?

Family planning anyone?

Honestly, I do not know what is stopping me from falling pregnant again for the second time. There is no exact reason in this matter and I do not know how to say in a proper way. The best words I can type in here are- 'mix feelings'-. I am not on the pill, well I had the pills before but it only lasted for three months after giving birth to Haris and then I stopped. Nevertheless,  I still keeping the balance of the two boxes of the contraceptive pills in my safety aid box.

Thinking of the precaution for not having another babies in the mean time, my husband and I have decided to use another protection in practicing our so called 'family planning'. We opted for natural way because I do not feel taking jabs or medicines at all for planning. Alhamdulillah, until now we still ok with the option.

Now, Haris is 2 years old plus, I was thinking to have another baby perhaps in the next year though I still having double thought on it :-)). Never mind, because I believe if the God wills, nothing is impossible. 'Kun fayakun'..Insya Allah.

How does my son learn his first thousands words?

I do not know how or what is the approach learning method that the mums out there take in introducing words to teach their kids, but for me I use the books with the colorful pictures and the flash cards. I love teaching Haris by using flash cards because there are words and pictures on the same cards. No matter how difficult the words are, I will keep saying them over and over again until Haris recognizes the things. It is a long learning process but patience is the key.

Let's say I teach him about ball, but I make him understand not all the round things are the ball. There are circle and sphere, with the same pattern but not the same meaning. Baby accent is no-no. I will correct his pronunciation to make him say it right. Sometimes, he keeps saying in his accent but does not matter, because there will be a moment when he will definitely know how to say it in a right way. Toddlers' brains are like sponges. They absorb everything quickly, so that is why we need to avoid saying something bad in front of them.

Well, actually I was meant to tell about the folder's book that I bought for Haris on the first day of Eid, I went to the book shop to buy the English magazines for me until I came across with this folder for the kids. A folder about learning the first thousands words. This folder contains a pictures dictionary, a hundred flash cards, the cd , the sticker's book and the stickers itself. Without having second thought, I just grabbed the folder even though the price was quite expensive. Though, for learning I do not mind, because it is like an investment. Investment to give a proper learning to my son in hoping he will be a smart person, InsyaAllah.

I taught Haris the words by using the pictures on the stickers and after recognizing and knowing every single words on it, I will ask Haris to stick the pictures on the sticker's book, right in the small boxes on the left hand side of the book. This sticker's book is like a self made dictionary and trust me, he was having fun while learning. As a mum, I would be delighted seeing him happy!

I will show the rest of the items in this folder's book in my next entry ;-)

Small Learning Space

his small playing n learning space. The table, the old laptop for nursery rhymes time, the sandpit, the ABC's mat, the toys' basket, soon to be added the book shelves to arrange his books. Mama just loves buying books for him :-). Oh and the magnetic board! The rules is, he must tidy up after playing, and amazingly he did. After being scolded by mama if he did not.

video of him

 Up to two years in his life...Haris..who else? hehehe

The moment he said good bye to his best buddies..

Weaning is easier if the time is right for the babies. My personal experience of weaning my boy was only took a month or less until he definitely stopped breast milk.  The initial planned when I knew I fell pregnant was to mix feeding the formula with the breast milk but it turned out I fully breastfeed Haris because he totally rejected the bottles and the formula. Being a full time housewife was a privilege in giving direct supplied since he 24/7 with me. Thus, from the day onwards he became a baby who breastfed exclusively. Alhamdulillah it was his sustenance.

When he reached 23 months old, I was having a thought of the ideas to stop breastfeeding. I got so many infos from friends and some of them said, 'try to apply something like tamarind juice, food coloring , nescafe etc on the breast  in hoping, the baby hates the taste of those things and stop taking milk'. Unfortunately,  I never tried any of them.

One day I chatted with my old unimate, I asked her what did she do to stop her first baby from the breast and she said, she did nothing because by two years old her baby just quit by herself. So, from the day onwards I kept praying to Allah in hope Haris will quit easily before turning two. At the same time I tried to feed him lesser than his daily intake. No more feeding during the day only once at night before sleeping or in the early morning. Usually, Haris always forget to drink before sleeping due to his tiring activities in the day , so it ended up he fell asleep easily at night.

After a week or two left for Haris to celebrate his two years old milestone, he got used with the ideas of weaning.

Nevertheless, one think I will definitely remember for the rest of my life which was the last day he had the breast. I never realized this but it made me thinking lately.  It was Friday the 5th September 2011. I was spending my night at Sheraton Hotel to spend my last moment with my closed friend before she went back to Malaysia for good. It was in the fasting month. As usual, when Haris wake up in the morning, he will ask for the milk but he stopped asking since the past two weeks.

Though, on that Friday he was not himself, I could tell. He was dreaming and sobbing continuously in his dream . Sounding like heart wrenching  :-(  until making me whispered on his ears something like this ' Haris, nak susu  ke haris, kesian kat haris..Ya Allah kalau betul anak aku haus dan nak susu sangat2 tolongla bagi ada susu dan cukup utk dia pagi ni'.

Exactly that was the doa' which I was saying in that peaceful morning with sorrow heart after listening my baby sobbing in his sleeping. When I fed him, he kept weeping and seriously his voiced resulting in me had teary eyes. He kept sulking for the milk for a few minutes and the tears kept dropping on his small cheeks. Hesitate not,  I stroked his hairs to wake him up and gave him a morning bath. ( We woke up very early since we needed to check out the hotel before 8am and went off to the airport).

The incident on that Friday morning, was the last time he had breast milk and he never asked for the milk anymore. After a few weeks, I can conclude why he was so sad that day in his dreamed. Perhaps, he knew that was the last time he will had the milk and perhaps he knew he had to say good bye to his best buddies because he was no longer a baby and he just knew it was the time to stop, forever. He stopped just 16 days before he turned two years old.

Allah granted my dua.  Alhamdulillah, it was an easy journey for me as a mum to wean my fully breastfed baby. It melancholy moment for both of us when the time was up but I am happy and glad because he had the best  milk ever and trust me,  the bonding between the mum and the baby while breastfeeding is unspeakable...Very exquisite indeed....

As the time I write this entry I could not help shedding tears of thinking ' Am I going to have the chance to breastfeed again in the future?'..Que sera-sera.. I hope I will..InsyaAllah. Weaning does not mean Haris and I are getting apart. Everynight before sleeping he will ask to hold my hands before drifting in his slumber and I guess, no matter what, he will always be my baby to me and deep in my heart I know it...